I want to fight the darkness in the world but sometimes to fight the darkness is to fight myself. I feel as though I am Eustace wrapped in a dragon's skin fearing the pain it will take to shed it.

There are times I wish for a safer God, one that isn't so unruly and unpredictable. A God that was less dangerous and more tame. A God less wild, less...box breaking. For I would tell a different story, I would weave a different tale. But then for a moment I catch a glimpse of Him in the blazing sunrise that burns away the morning mist and I remember, I remember that although I am a forgetful lover I am still loved. I remember Jesus. Jesus who wrapped himself into mortal flesh to save his Eve, who walked with dust covered feet, sawdust clinging to his beard, children caught up in his arms, and loving in a way the world had never seen before. And I remember that I am loved and that is enough for me.