I learned from a young age that people can never be trusted not to leave you.
Friends come and go.
People hurt people.
People use people.
I was about 7 when my best friend would have nothing to do with me because we left the church where they went.
I cried and asked God after praying for a best friend for years He would take her away.
Then the friends closest to me were caught in the middle of a messy divorce and I wasn't on the right "side".
Maybe that's why I held on so tight for so long when I knew I should have let go.
I was so terrified that once again I would be left alone.
That no matter how much you love someone--they will leave.
But it's good.
If my life were easy I would never have to lean on God.
Had my friends never left me when I was a kid-I wouldn't know how to deal with this now nearly as well.
Had this not happened now I would not know how strong God really is.
God loves me to much to give me what I want.
And as much as I fight and squirm against His will.
As much as I shout at the heavens screaming for answers to my impossible questions.
At the end of the day...I am thankful.