Tuesday, April 16, 2013

What should I do next?

“What would I actually do if I had it to do all over again? Heeding John’s counsel, I would simply do the next thing in love.”– Brennan Manning

This quote has been playing in the background of my thoughts lately.

I love it. I love this quote because I love to over complicate things and it cuts through all my questions as to what I should do next. It hacks away at my desire to know the end result of something before I begin, it prunes through all of the existential stuff I deal with and gets back to the heart of the matter.

What should I do next? Doesn't really matter--just infuse it, cover it, soak it, and then actually do it - with love.

Sometimes I feel like a rose bush; I grow best when I am pruned back with regularly and remember that the important things really are not as complicated as my overly analytical self would like to make them.

When my life is interrupted-speak with love. When that person is about to get on my last nerve...what should I do? Whatever doing something in love looks like. What does my future look like? What is God going to do with my life? What does He want from me? Those questions are answered almost irritatingly simple truth -- "Whatever you do Ming, do it in love." 
The part that is incredibly frustrating is that I fail to do it most of the time. I forget that this is what I am created to do-and I begin to think and act like the dirt of the earth is all that is woven into my being and that it has the only and final word.I lose my temper, I gossip, I spin the story to make myself look more favorably in my own eyes and in the eyes of others, I judge, I let offences steep in my soul, I become apathetic, my eyes wander, I forget who I am, I am the prodigal and the stuck up son who stayed home, and I run away from the very One who would save me.
I am trying though, grasping this idea and the God behind it. 

Remembering that He loves me no matter what I do and maintains a firm grip on me because I cannot hold on myself. Remembering that in the midst of my brokenness and failings: I am loved. I am cherished and adored and loved and valued beyond comprehension, just as I am and not as I should be because I willnever be what I should be this side of heaven. 

And when I make my camp here and remember who I am, what follows is freedom and love.
And then, and only then can I really love.


Do things.
Don't just say things.
Do things.
Don't just do things capriciously.
Do things and purposely infuse and cover them with love.

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